Feedle Flips Out: The IRC Rant
Created: 30 May 2001

I invite comments, and I'll be adding them to the bottom of the page.

From feedle@feedle.net Thu May 31 01:25:30 2001
Date: Wed, 30 May 2001 22:13:41 +0000 (GMT)
From: C. Sullivan 
To: friendsoffeedle 
Subject: feedle's finally flipped out..

Sometime about six months ago, I had started to write this entire diatribe
about how the "scene" had degraded to a point of sandbox games and
childish bullshit.  At the last minute, I hit ^C and decided that perhaps
I was just upset about the situation at that time, and that perhaps I
should reconsider.

I couldn't have been more wrong.

I'm sick of hanging around people who's entire goal in life seems to be to
erect little fiefdoms to try to "control" people around them.  Whether
it's the #dc-stuff EFnet channel, the DoC, or even Priest and company at
DefCon, this seems to be a recurring theme amongst the "scene", that
people set up these arbitrary kingdoms as a way of exercising control over
others.  

When I started the Los Angeles Research Coalition, my goal was to provide
a place where people could hang out, maybe work on some projects together,
and to generally have fun and learn.  I consciously chose not to exercise
any control, and to let the group as a collective decide the direction we
should go.  One member had space we could rent in the back of a
warehouse, so we collected funds and rented it.  Another had a project
involving Area 51.  We fantasized about our little robots marching through
the desert at Denny's.  We put on radio shows and started a caravan that
to this day continues, even though the LARC group has effectively
disbanded and only one of the original five members is still involved with
the caravan.

But most of all, we had fun.. and most importantly, did our own thing
without some unifying force, and even more amazingly, nobody needing to
bust kneecaps when somebody "stepped out of line."

And that's the point I'm coming to.  The "scene" was _SUPPOSED_ to be
something anti-authoritative... the whole POINT of the monthly meetings at
Union Station in Los Angeles was for INDIVIDUALS to collect and share
ideas, techniques, and stories.  Since moving to San Francisco, that seems
to have all changed.  SF2600 meetings seem to be meetings of
cliques.  You've got the DoC and Pete Shipley over here.  You've got the
New Hack people deciding that we wanna have this thing at the Metreon
(Sony Corporation's lawsuit of 2600 Magazine be damned).  Even I have been
guilty of this behavior: not fitting in with the established cliques, I
sit in the corner and mope... perhaps joining Chip, JonM, and JustaBill
for dinner at Chevy's.

That individuality, that "meeting of the minds" experience isn't here
anymore.  I'd like to think that perhaps the "minds" are still around,
feeling like I do... but I don't see any evidence of that.  I'd love to be
proven wrong.

For myself, I cannot see wasting my emotional energies and time continuing
to associate with a collective that seems completely uninterested in not
only my potential contributions, but the contributions of many others who
I consider to be bright people.  I can't be idle when I see fights break
out on IRC over what amounts to second grade playground bullshit.  There's
so much more we all could be doing with our time.

It's actually pathetic.  Those of is in the Bay Area are living at the
nexus of all activity, as far as the computer industry is concerned.  We
could be devoting our energies to constructing a west-cost l0pht (not the
new l0pht, but the old one) where all are welcome, from Linux newbies to
Deth Veggie (snicker) to hang out, share a beer, and perhaps learn
something new (or teach it, if they're so inclined).  There's enough
surplus computer equipment in the #(*%ing dumpsters of this town to
provide a tinkerer's workstation with enough junk to make anybody
happy.  There's enough, and enough to go around.

So why are we acting like playground kids fighting over the one swingset?

I can't explain that.  I can only explain that I can't muster the
emotional strength to tolerate it anymore without getting upset and
extremely irritated.

I'm not asking anybody to join me on some epic quest for Truth.  I'm not
even demanding that people leave these hovels.  It's just I can't stay
here anymore.  I'm 31, and I feel I'm getting too old for playground
bullshit.  I'd like to actually accomplish something before I'm too old to
do it anymore.  

I'd like to be free of these playground gangs.

-Fedl
PS: It's unlikely I'll be hanging around on IRC anymore.  Part of this is
the bullshit involved with maintaining a presence there.  I can be reached
by E-Mail or by AOL IM (don't groan) at Feedlebom.  

Update, July 16 2002

Okay, I wrote that over a year ago. Since that time, I've wandered back onto IRC. And guess what? The shit continues.

I must really like pain and suffering. I must be a glutton for punishment or something. Or, I'm just #(%# stupid.

It's the same everywhere. It is now my personal belief that everybody on IRC is there solely to play these little political games. Everybody either wants to be king, or to be a member of the fiefdoms. Don't rock the boat, or the "king" will get pissed off and vote you off the island.

Screw that noise. Screw the people who expend energy on constantly trying to appease these "kings." And screw the "kings" themselves.. people who (by in large) haven't done shit other than be at the right place at the right time, to fence off their little square acre of Internet real-estate just so they could install a moat and build their little lame ass castle.

It's a funny thing. I tried, repeatedly, when I was in SF to put together something that I thought was cool: a place that everybody could get together and play. A place not unlike LARC, if a little smaller in scope given real estate costs in the Bay Area. It didn't happen.

I've been in Phoenix less than a year, most of that time without steady employment, just contract work and odd jobs. Yet, in that short period of time, I've managed to create the environment I wanted to create in the Bay. Sure, it's not without problems (don't even ask me about the damned roll-up door that keeps coming off the track), but it's happening.. without anybody having to get "medieval" on anybody else. And without politics, without bullshit.

This extends far beyond just IRC. Don't expect me to be at DefCon this year, or probably ever again. It's endemic of a "scene" that worships a guy who thinks he's a rock star, and yet apparently can't control his temper enough to keep from breaking someone's laptop. It's sick and twisted.

I can count the people who are worthwhile in this "scene" on one hand. And you know what? All of 'em, save maybe one, has nothing to do with the "scene" anymore. There are a few people that I can name that are cool, and they're probably people I'd add to the list.. but I'm not really friends with them. At least, I don't have their phone numbers memorized.

But I've been in the "scene" now for over 10 years. It's pretty pathetic to consider that I've met seven people.. ten tops (if you include the two that have died since I first came along) who were worth the effort required to befriend. The list may come to twelve or thirteen if you add in the people I knew from outside the scene (like the one guy who was a BBS SysOp in the Inland Empire who I knew through WWIVlink) who happened to find their way into it.

After ten years? I met more worthwhile people manning the computer lab at Rancho Santiago College for one semester.

So, screw it. I don't need to continue to associate with this kind of crowd. By in large, it's full of people who's ethics are in question, their intelligence in doubt, and their intoxication level too high for meaningful discussion.

This started out as a rant about IRC. It's ending up looking like the entire "computer underground" (*snort* *chuckle*) is exactly like IRC... full of people with too much time on their hands who seem only interested in ruining people's day, and certainly too stupid to do anything original.

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